View Full Version : you yes you will you crit me!!:)

04-09-2005, 02:00 PM
yey you all . im not to good with clean drawing yet but with experince i wil........i think:)http://tinypic.com/2n4z0g

04-09-2005, 03:12 PM
ummm. it's a challenging pose. unfortunately the anatomy is completely screwed. i will attempt a drawover to better illustrate what i'm talking about. but it'll take me a little while.

your lines aren't actually that messy. so i wouldn't worry about that.


04-09-2005, 03:16 PM
Nah the anatomy, proportion wise isn't that bad, just some muscle issues. If I were you, I'd draw figures without the funky attributes first though, get comfortable with drawing all kinds of poses, and then start adding stuff like wings, and weird, weird outfits and huge swords. Dunno, not really my taste, a little too japanese pop culture to me.

Anyway, it's easier to see the bigger picture when you practice on plain figures first, you won't get awkward shoulders and legs that way, when you can't cover them.

04-09-2005, 04:06 PM
drawover here (http://www.geocities.com/garaigh/altrodesi_drawover.jpg)

the blue and red image on the right is a rough adjustment of the basic parts of your figure into something that is more anatomically correct. the biggest problem is that you aren't overlapping the ribcage and the midtorso/hips section. but they should be overlapped. right now your character not only seems to have a bendy ribcage but the distance between bottom of the ribs and top of the pelvis would be way too long if the character straightened up. i also think you should be able to see more of the shoulders on either side of his head.

my tablet skills are nil so i apologize for the roughness of the drawover but hopefully it will help explain things better than my written critique can.

i like the pose. i think you're very bold to try something this challenging. but you should remember that the pelvis and the ribs are sort of like two blocks of wood connected by a short, stiff piece of rope. the blocks of wood can't bend and the rope is too short to allow a lot of off-set between the two. if you're looking at the ribcage from the top and the pelvis from the front most of the bendiness in the rope will already have been taken up which means there's not much left for side to side movement. if this description is confusing let me know and i'll sketch it out for you.

nice work on the details for the costume. just keep working on the anatomy and it'll really start to come together.

@ Lexar: look. i know you were trying to be nice but the fact is the anatomy is screwed and it's not just about proportions either.


04-09-2005, 04:43 PM
your pose is off and my legs not like that. hes raising his left up and across his right

04-09-2005, 04:46 PM
No it's just that in this particular picture, the changes in the pose to make the anatomy be correct would have a minimum impact in the overall picture. Of course it's not spot on, but the main issue here is the awkward looking arms and shoulders, and the sword. In my opinion, that has the highest priority.

04-09-2005, 04:51 PM
I have to agree with e.p., torso is very long and bent in the middle at an unnatural angle (even though I shouldn't really say what's unnatural for a person with wings). The drawing is nice otherwise though and I think you can salvage it by redrawing the torso.
Is he supposed to be gripping that sword? It's kind of hard to tell.
The lines are not too bad, time to start inking (I'm the one to talk, I just started trying out real inking today after years of doing it digitally ^^)

04-09-2005, 04:52 PM
oh im not trying to be smart emmapeel. that spine line isnt right.i..... really dont know.:). plz help me.

04-09-2005, 04:55 PM
thanks pofo and all cound one of you draw my exact pose and anatomy for a reference i could use.:)

04-09-2005, 05:25 PM
your pose is off and my legs not like that. hes raising his left up and across his right

eh. that was what i thought i drew. stick figures are hard to show depth on.

i don't know about the pose. i tried to interpret what it seemed you were trying to do (minus the errors) but again, that can be hard when there are errors. if you would like a more detailed sketch i can do that but i need to know if he's sitting and we're looking down on him or what. if he's hanging in midair i have to say i think the idea of bringing his leg up like that is pretty impractical.

whatever. let me know if you want more.


Evil Iori
04-09-2005, 05:28 PM
what exactly is he doing?? is might be easier to help you if i knew what he was doing. well i think he should be holding his sword by the handle not the blade =) and his not even actually holding it, unless u did that intentionally. that target on his back is really flat, other than the long torso, the wings maybe could use some work. its good to see you are trying new poses without references. keep practising.

04-09-2005, 06:01 PM
hmm well the theme for this pic is a guy that has stollen a sword and trys to get away by jumping off of a building. Hes happy hes gotten away and i just wanted to move a leg to create a pose unexpected....thats all. still need help i suck at muscles and anatomy but i try to produce good posses and learn from my errors my drawing alot of posses.expierience

04-10-2005, 08:06 AM
Emma's right this time! you may want to concentrate on the forms before adding all the detail IE cylinders spheres cubes etc then when that good lay on all the detaily goodness !
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04-10-2005, 09:58 AM
well here it is.hope i did good. slooppy i knohttp://tinypic.com/2nnbkh

04-10-2005, 11:40 AM
NO NO NO - this is a gesture sketch ! ( and a good one too) Now lay on all the forms-thigh is a cylinder , head is an elongated sphere, fingers are cylinders , torso is a trucated rectangle, then comes the refined shapes , and finally the detaily goodness.
This is the only way I know to help you it's very tempting to jump ahead but if you do it will show. After learning this you will be able to "shorthand " some of the steps but I'm afraid this is the way the pros do it.
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04-10-2005, 12:41 PM
john would howtodrawmanga tutorials be a good reference for me?

04-10-2005, 12:56 PM
you're making exactly the same mistake with the torso again. the ribcage doesn't bend!

the sideways curve in the torso is not right. there isn't enough space between ribs and pelvis to get that sort of curve. and the ribs won't bend sideways like that.

i did a second sketch for you. on the left hand side is the body in profile. the arrow at the top shows the angle at which the viewer would be looking at the character in your pic. the red lines are to show that the shoulders (and ribcage) will cover up almost the entire torso from that angle. on the right hand side of the page is the figure from the angle you're drawing him.

sketch (http://www.geocities.com/agrbrown/sketch_for_altrodesi.jpg)

if you don't understand that then there isn't much else i can tell you.

@johnfields: Emma's right this time! what's that supposed to mean?


04-10-2005, 01:04 PM
Exactly what it says
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04-10-2005, 04:17 PM
How and where is the sword being held up?

04-10-2005, 05:55 PM
its falling.

04-10-2005, 06:32 PM
Try to find - Drawing Dynamic Comics by Andy Smith real good stuff on breakdowns and propotions
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04-11-2005, 01:46 AM
Wow, thats a good IDEA of a pose, but truth is he IS off center a bit.If you have a little action hero figure guy (Spiderman ect.) take him pose him like the position of your angel guy, then look at the EXACT same angle that you are trying to draw him from. When you are drawing a unfamiliar angle you MUST get a feel with a 3-d model of sorts. This gets harder when its pure sci-fi alien-esque, but for starting flavor get your feet wet with basic poses.

04-11-2005, 03:09 PM
Thanks dragon claw and all i have that book by andy smith my friend has it right now let him hold it.hes been holden it for 1 year and a half.ill ask him for it.:)

04-11-2005, 03:22 PM
i have it but what about the kingdom hearts nice pic to
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04-11-2005, 03:30 PM
i like it personally, cool idea

04-11-2005, 04:14 PM
Also, you may want to work on differing line widths, it'd just make it easier to tell whats what.

04-12-2005, 03:11 PM
well i asked tu[x]edo he said to move the kne down. what do u all think.i also have the book back and looking over it.

04-12-2005, 06:27 PM
ya move down on the knee and work on your anatomy to

04-12-2005, 06:31 PM
grrr im dying so many different views

05-14-2005, 01:12 PM
hmmm well I see. did you use any ref. this time because you never showed me this one...he he at least i dont remember ...hmm well its a nice pic but the legs is sort of out of proportion becuse if hes jumping off a roof then both legs should be up right ...i dont really know but the leg seems to look like it hurts from that position. one question. is your person short, a midget?? because the leg that crosses the other, the thigh is unnoticable.